Monday, February 20, 2017

Sunday Morning Party Line

This Sunday, the War of the True Conservative Scotsmen raged on, both on The Twitter Machine --

-- and on the Sunday Shows (from Meet the Press):
CHUCK TODD:  Welcome back. Panel is here, Hugh Hewitt, host on the Salem Radio Network, former Democratic Congresswoman Donna Edwards of Maryland. She's been on an RV tour so she took a break. Amy Walter, national editor of the Cook Political Report, and David Brooks, columnist for the New York Times. Welcome all
If the American political has manifested two more consistently wrong knuckleheads than Brooks and Hewitt I have yet to have the pleasure, so of course they have Reserved Seating on Meet the Press.

Because the nation's Overton Window was long ago crated up and hauled away to the Maple Street.

Where The Monsters Are Due.

And now that the Monsters are actually here, the spectrum of Acceptable Beltway Political Discourse now runs from Brooks (or Matthew Dowd or Bloody Bill Kristol) to Hewitt (or Brit Hume).

From feckless Beltway frauds like Brooks and Dowd and Kristol, who spent their careers peddling Imaginary Conservatism snake oil and building the Maple Street Monsters, and who now cower in the nave of the High and Holy Church of Both Siderism frantically denying that they had anything to do with anything --
CHUCK TODD:   ... David, I'm going to start with you. Two columns this week that you had were headlined "How Should One Resist the Trump Administration?" That was a Valentine's Day. "What a Failed Trump Administration Looks Like." You have-- That's pretty declarative in thirty days.

DAVID BROOKS: Enemy of the people. I'm an enemy of the people. You know what, my fear of the administration as it's shaken out so far is not that it's incipient fascism, it's that it's anarchy. There are 696 appointed jobs that need, require Senate confirmation, and the Trump administration hasn't come up, named 692 of them. And so there's nobody home in the government. The civil service has basically opted out because they've been offended by Trump. The court system has given themselves permission to block every Trump initiative because they've been attacked by Trump. The intelligence community is some sort of disarray or disaffection. To lead, you actually need to lead a government. And the government has gone AWOL. And so in one of those columns I liken him to Captain Kirk on the Starship Enterprise at the command deck pushing the pretty buttons, but they're not attached to anything. And I've been in touch with a lot of foreign officials this week. They're noticing and they're afraid of a weak United States.
-- to stone, cold wingut goons like Hewitt and Hume who have always been out and proud about their neofascism and are de-fucking-lighted that the Monsters they worked so hard to bring to life are finally here:
HUGH HEWITT:  I think they're going to remember given the rally yesterday that he has got deep and lasting support in red America. And I disagree with David pretty fundamentally on where we are right now. And I think that to quote Dan Rather, "News is where you look." I look at Intel investing seven billion and bringing 3,000 jobs to Arizona.

I look at the Gorsuch nomination. I look at Reince's interview with you which was spectacular. I think if he names John Bolton as his national security advisor today he will find another ally who can do the Sunday shows as well as Reince did with you and articulate...
Hewitt continued to lobby for appointing the objectively batshit John Bolton to the most important national security job on Earth, and casually shrug off the idea of tens of millions of Americans losing their health insurance because as, I have pointed out many times before, Hewitt is not, in fact, human.

A cyborg sent from the future to destroy America who Comcast/NBC pays to be one of the Respectable Teevee Faces of the Turd Reich.  

And David Brooks -- life-long Republican establishmentarian testicle cozy who has never met a Republican atrocity he would not instantly try to disperse with his mighty Both Siderist Hammer -- is now the Respectable Teevee Face of the Opposition.  

Yes, you have now lived long enough to see David Fucking Brooks repackaged and resold to the Great Wad by Comcast and The New York Times as a leader of the resistance (much to the consternation of noted has-been actor and Conservative lunatic James Woods.)
Which is why it should surprise no one that Brooks' idea of "resistance" (which Chuck Todd never actually touched on because it is too fucking ridiculous) is exactly the sort of scheme you would expect from a life-long Republican establishmentarian testicle cozy whose career depends on not offending powerful people or admitting that his Republican party is the problem (from me last week, "Sex Advice from a Eunuch"): doesn't involve actually "resisting" anything, but instead relies on the entire Republican Party wandering off and getting lost in the woods so that the apparatus of government can be magically taken over and repaired by a generation of Gerald Fords who will suddenly appear and spring into action and fix everything.  
Also on Meet the Press, John McCain did what he always does: fling himself at the nearest available microphone to Talk Big about Murrica and Patriotism, before shambling back to the Congress to obediently toe the party line. His doddering "Maverick" show is an embarrassment which should have closed out of town 20 years ago.   Meanwhile, on ABC, Right-Wing Mole Jonathan Karl had the duty and invited CNN-quality-hire and Trump enforcement-droid Corey Lewandowski to use our public airwaves to lie to the American people.

Sure it was obscene, but isn't is all obscene?

So let us pause this war of the True Conservative Scotsmen to bring you a report on what one awful Libtards was writing 12 years ago, back when every one of these assholes were terribly busy braiding each other's hair, fawning over the economic and military genius of the Bush Administration, slandering the Left and cackling about their Permanent Republican Majority..  From April of 2005:
Little Red State Fundy sez...

Whatever will we tell the children? Posted by Hello

One day we will have to explain to the children what happened when Thurston Howell III lost his right mind and decided that for the sake of some tax cuts to make him incrementally more comfortable, his very bestest buddies in the whole, wide world were the Ultra Right Wing Gorgons down in Jesusland.

May I suggest the following?

The Story of Little Red State Fundy

Little Red State Fundy found a grain of hate.

"Who will help me plant the hate?" she asked.

"Not I," said the Moderate Republicans.

"Not I," said the Undecideds.

"Not I," said the Libertarians.

"Then I will," said Little Red State Fundy.

So she buried the hate in the bloody ground of the Old Confederacy. After a while it grew up paranoid and ignorant and violent.

"The hate is ripe now," said Little Red State Fundy. "Who will do the mass mailings and preach bigotry from the Pulpit?"

"Not I," said the Moderate Republicans.

"Not I," said the Undecideds.

"Not I," said the Libertarians.

"Then I will," said Little Red State Fundy.

So she licked envelopes until her bill was cracked and dry and stood up into the House of God and crowed to her flocks in their millions that God Loved Them for hating and killing creatures who were not like them.

Then she asked, "Who will help me focus this hatred politically?"

"Not I," said the Moderate Republicans.

"Not I," said the Undecideds.

"Not I," said the Libertarians.

"Then I will," said Little Red State Fundy.

So she made databases and phone banks, and walked door-to-door with petitions that talked of Gods Great Hatred of Gays, and Gods Great Hatred of Judges that did not worship the Hate God in exactly the way the Little Red State Fundy told them to.

Then she carried the hate to steps of the Congress and the White House.

"Who will make a mandate from this hate?" she asked.

"Not I," said the Moderate Republicans.

"Not I," said the Undecideds.

"Not I," said the Libertarians.

"Then I will," said Little Red State Fundy.

So she got on the phone with her very good friend Karl Rove and with his help organized carpools to the polls, and get-out-the-vote drives, anti-gay marriage amendments and smear campaigns. For Jesus.

And Little Red State Fundy delivered the margin of victory and was featured in many, many magazines: without Little Red State Fundy, the Republican Party could never, ever, ever win anything.

And now everybody knew it.

Then she said, "Now who shall help me Rule the Earth."

"We will!" said Moderate Republicans, Undecideds, and Libertarians.

"I am quite sure you would," said Little Red State Fundy, "but see, now you are all my bitches."

Then she called Randall Terry and Tom DeLay and Ann Coulter and Jerry Falwell and Rush Limbaugh and James Dobson, and they and the rest of the Shining Path Republicans used what was left of the Constitution as ass-floss.
And judges were terrorized into silence.
And those deemed ungodly were beaten in the streets.
And they invaded whoever the fuck they felt like, for whatever fucking reason they chose.
And the very idea of a Free and Fair press died.

And to people who had been very clear all along that they genuinely believed in a Theocratic Nanny State and thought that precipitating Armageddon and triggering the Second Coming should be the highest calling of any worldly government, were handed over the police, courts, government, treasury and nuclear weapons stockpiles of the United States of America.

And in the end -- just as they had been warned for the past twenty years -- there was nothing whatsoever left at all for Moderate Republicans, Undecideds, and Libertarians.

And one more thought, courtesy of Brother Charlie Pierce:
And, please, for the love of god, ye editors and news directors throughout the land, enough with the expeditions into the heartland to talk to people who helped bring this down upon themselves and on us. These folks have nothing new to say. They voted their id and their spleen and they're still on a high from that. Some guy in a café in Dubuque wants to say that he voted for this president* because he "tells it like it is," or because he thinks the steel mills are coming back? Can you watch that rally in Florida and believe that these opinions have any real merit?
These opinions had no merit 12 years ago.

They have no merit now.

And they will have no merit two years from now when the Pig People rise as one to declare that none of this was their fault and that they've never even heard of Donald Trump

Saturday, February 18, 2017

This Post is a Trick

See if you can spot it...

Here is a video of John Dean on the Joy-Ann Reid program today 
talking about the deeply authoritarian core of the GOP 

And here is a photo of Evil Liberal John Dean speaking while 
America-hating radical Liberal Barry Goldwater looks on.

You know, for all the general bebitching and bemoaning about the horrible state of public discourse in this country (now that Progressives have started to counterpunch) we Lefties are always faced with three, glaringly obvious facts:
1. The Right started this fucking firestorm. The evidence is overwhelming and incontrovertible. They did it to court the extreme, rightwing theocrats and racists that now have taken over their Party, and without whom it would be impossible for them to ever win another election. They did it coldly and with deliberate calculation.

2. Efforts to laugh off or “meet them halfway” have been a failure. Efforts at appeasement of the Mussolini-hearted men who rule the GOP have yielded nothing on the Left but the failed triangulation policy that keeps DLC consultants in big cake and hairplugs…and nothing from the Right except howls of laughter. In the absolutist conservative lexicon, Compromise = Capitulation, and therefore view compromise as spineless and cowardly. So at any effort to find genuine compromise and simply they redouble their “Liberals are vacillating Frenchmen who believe in nothing” narrative. Converselym any effort at standing pat on principle and they redouble their “Liberals are obstructionist” hooligans narrative.

To the Modern Conservative, democracy is a zero-sum-game and Liberals are not the opposition, but the Enemy. To be wiped out as expeditiously as possible.

3. The Persistent Vegetative Press have long since been beaten and starved to the point of abject capitulation, so no joy there. They steadfastly and conspicuously refuse to report on one of the biggest stories of the last 40 years: that Republican Party has been taken over by Stalinists. Instead they have positively sprinted in the opposite direction: burying any story that is critical of the GOP qua GOP, and forever fishing around in the margins for ways in which they can cast the Left as somehow equally and oppositely bad as the Right.

This “Fallacy of False Bisection” is the Conservative Propaganda Firewall; the press’ protective delusion that the “Center” is the Absolute Good wherever is happens to be located today. So that all a Conservative needs to do to radically shift the debate in his direction is to keep charging deeper into the twilight Tyranny/Fascism territory. And, no matter how far he goes, because the Lapdog Press has no fixed principle except “balance”, they will dutifully pace off half the distance between Ann Coulter and the Democrat Du Jure and arbitrarily declare that THIS is where the Reasonable Middle should be.


Ignoring, of course, the fact that tomorrow the "Center" will be 100 miles to the Right, and since Theocrat Conservative starting playing this game, “the Right” has been dragged so many million parsecs to the Right, the beliefs of a New Reasonable Middle Man would make Richard Nixon look like a Socialist.
So with the Press stiff and cold and the Right gone mad, who are we talking to anymore?

In the short term, I have always believed we are talking to the actual middle.

People who many have signed up with the Conservatives because they bought Rush’s despicable lies, because it gave them someone to blame and there was no one to tell them otherwise.

People who should be Democrats, but watched the Democrats roll over and try to play nice-nice with the GOP as it was infested and seized by the scum of the Earth, instead of whipping the crap out of them.

People who have been conned into believing they are forced to choose between “strong, vicious and stupid” and “weak, cowardly and smart”. Who have been brainwashed (with the assistance of Vichy Democrats) into thinking that those are their only options. Who hate those choices and long for others, but also know, in a dangerous world, stronger is a better bet.

People respond to strength, which is why when Dems fight -- really and persistently fight -- Dems eventually win.

Because our ideas really are better (and among them, yes, we will be raising taxes. Fucking-A. We’ll be rolling back the Bush tax cuts to the wealthy, Day One, 8:00, you mooching, thieving pricks.)

Our theologies are better – all of ‘em!

Our sense of humanity and compassion is not only vastly superior, but something we are actually proud of.

We love our Constitution and not just our Flag.

We don’t think the end of the world is either inevitable or desirable: We pray for peace and a million more years of sunrises, and not for fucking Armageddon.

We respect the lessons on past, but passionately believe in the future; we fight for it and not some delusional, idealized, Disneyfied, Conservative Times of Yore that never existed.

We love our Nation Ideals and not just our zip code.

Our women are sexier and smarter and stronger that you can possibly comprehend. And instead of finding that threatening and terrifying, we find it...magnificent.

Our culture is healthier.

And although we love our beer, our Liberal Chardonnay kicks ass.

That’s in the short term.

In the longer term we are all addressing the Future. The generations yet unborn who will look back at America and wonder just what in the fuck happened to make us lose our natural minds!

Well, consider what would happen if we still lived in a society where “proof” actually meant something. Where clapping your hands over your ears and whirling away dervish-like screaming “La-La-La-I-Cannot-Hear-You” when confronted with facts would get you mocked and laughed at, and not appointed to head the local Republican Party.

Consider, say, the case of Albert Einstein and general relativity (In the end how do you know you're a geek? When all your little parables seem to feature a little physics)…
… of all the thousands of eclipses studied by scientists, the most important one was the eclipse of 1919, which was able to provide the clinching evidence in favour of one of the most revolutionary ideas in the history of physics, namely Einstein’s theory of general relativity.

Although general relativity was a radically new formulation of gravity, its predictions were largely consistent with Newton’s highly successful theory of gravity. However, Einstein’s theory did make one or two predictions which distinguished it from Newton’s theory, and, if true, these predictions would show that Einstein’s model was closer to reality. For example, Einstein predicted that a gravitational field should bend rays of light much more than was expected by Newton’s theory of gravity. Although the effect was too small to be observed in the laboratory, Einstein calculated that the immense gravity of the massive sun would deflect a ray of light by 1.75 seconds of arc – less that one thousandth of a degree, but twice as large as the deflection according to Newton, and significant enough to be measured.

Einstein pictured a scenario whereby the straight line of sight between a star and an observer on earth would be just blocked by the edge of the sun. Einstein believed that the star would still be visible because gravity would bend the rays of light around the sun and towards the earth. The sighting of a star that should have been blocked by the sun would prove Einstein right, but it is generally to impossible to see starlight that passes close to the sun, because it is swamped by the brilliance of the sun itself. However, during an eclipse, the sun is blacked out by the moon, and under such conditions a gravitationally distorted star should be visible.
Light bends, so general relativity is true (well, relatively.)

The Sun does not travel around the Earth, and a look through any telescope proves it.

It doesn’t matter that “germs” ain’t mentioned in the Bible: Cough on a slide, look at it under a microscope, and tell me what you see.

Now take a look at this video -- 

-- and see the evidence for our current plight just as unambiguous and quantifiable as orbital mechanics or the speed of light.

If you have the time, watch the whole thing, and to read the book, and realize that John Dean is, at heart, a lifelong and loyal old-school Conservative.

That his idol and friend was Barry Goldwater: Father of the Conservative Movement and a man who absolutely reviled the maggoty thing is had mutated into at the hands of the likes of Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson.

That what he is saying strongly parallels some of what founding Conservative Bill Buckley has already said.

And what Kevin Phillips (former Republican strategist and author of "The Emerging Republican Majority") said in his most recent treatise, “'American Theocracy”.

Conservatives all, each practically screaming in their own way that Conservatism is dead, gone, hollowed out and is being worn as sheep's clothing by despicable men who hate and oppose everything the Original Conservatives ever stood for.

So not only do Modern Conservative have contempt for the Founders of our country, they have moved so far into the abyss that they actually dismiss, ignore and revile the Founders of their own ideology.

Consider the numbers Dean is citing: That 23% of the American population are “pure, rightwing Authoritarian followers”. That a tiny fraction – perhaps 1% -- are Liberal, but the rest, the overwhelming majority, identify as Conservatives.

So right there you can kiss any precious pet theory of “balance” goodbye.

Then consider the shameful fact that only about half of the eligible public actually votes during Presidential elections anyway, and quite a bit less at the midterms. And given that it’s a pretty good bet that the 23% who are aggressive, dogmatic followers of a Dear Leader will be much more likely to find their way to the polls, they will be far more represented in the voting half of Americans than in the non-voting half.

So, being conservative (pun intended), lets say 40% of the actually voting public are those “pure, rightwing Authoritarian followers”

And then consider that the numerical split between Dems and Republicans is about 50/50, and the “pure, rightwing Authoritarian followers” tend to overwhelmingly be Conservatives, you end up with damned near 70-80% of Republican voters fitting this profile.

Then, just for good measure, figure out from your own experience how many voters of any Party are actually agenda-driving “activists” -- the ones who pound the pavement, evangelize and make and enforce policy and discipline -- and what kind of Leaders, Policy Makers and Disciplinarians you are likely to grow in this Brownshirt Hothouse, and you begin to see what Liberals have seen and tried to warn this nation about for decades.

That the Grand Old Party has been taken over by monsters.

That based on their perverse theology and enraged-sheep psychological makeup, they have very deliberately driven the traditional democratic model of leadership out of their Party in favor of an aggressively Authoritarian paradigm that is clear in its direction, ideology and intent.

That the GOP has a fascist soul.

Which is why we have to fight like hell. For our values. For our nation. And for that 10% in the middle.

Because appeasing people like this never works; just ask your fathers and grandfathers.

And because, specific programs, policies and timetables aside, in America when one Party openly runs on a single-planked platform of “FEAR” under the “Jebusland Uber Alles” banner, that should damned well be a good enough reason to vote for the other guys.

+   +   +   +   + 

Did you spot the trick?

The trick is, other than the lead-in video, this is a post I wrote 11 years ago.

Friday, February 17, 2017

Professional Left Podcast #376

"Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."  
-- Auric Goldfinger


"...Against All Enemies, Foreign and Domestic..." is the Oath They Pretended to Swear... the Almighty God they pretend to believe in.  

Watching the Wingnut Ouroboros Swallow Itself... the best god damn theater in town these days.  

The Trump Cabinet Confirmation Farce Proceeds Apace

Scott Pruitt, longtime adversary of EPA, confirmed to lead the agency

By Brady Dennis February 17 at 2:20 PM

Scott Pruitt, who as Oklahoma’s attorney general spent years suing the Environmental Protection Agency over its efforts to regulate various forms of pollution, was confirmed Friday as the agency’s next administrator.

Pruitt cleared the Senate by a vote of 52-46, winning support from two Democrats, Joe Manchin of West Virginia and Heidi Heitkamp of North Dakota. Only one Republican, Susan Collins of Maine, voted against him, saying he had “fundamentally different” views than she about the EPA’s role.

The vote came after Democrats held the Senate floor for hours overnight and through the morning to criticize Pruitt as a pawn of the fossil-fuel industry and to push for a last-minute delay of his confirmation. Part of their argument was an Oklahoma judge’s ruling late Thursday that Pruitt’s office must turn over thousands of emails related to his communication with oil, gas and coal companies. The judge set a Tuesday deadline for the release of the emails, which a nonprofit group had been seeking for more than two years.

Republicans pressed forward with the afternoon vote, saying Pruitt had been thoroughly vetted in recent months and calling on Democrats to end what Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) called “a historic level of obstruction” in holding up Trump administration nominees.

Pruitt’s confirmation marked a serious defeat for environmental advocacy groups, which wrote letters, waged a furious social media campaign, lobbied members of Congress, paid for television ads and sponsored a series of public protests to keep the Oklahoman from taking the reins of EPA.

“Scott Pruitt as administrator of the EPA likely means a full-scale assault on the protections that Americans have enjoyed for clean air, clean water and a healthy climate,” Michael Brune, executive director of the Sierra Club, said in an interview. “For environmental groups, it means we’re in for the fight of our lives for the next four years.”

Pruitt has sued the EPA more than a dozen times during the Obama administration, challenging the agency’s authority to regulate toxic mercury pollution, smog, carbon emissions from power plants and the quality of wetlands and other waters. In Oklahoma, he dismantled a specialized environmental protection unit that had existed under his Democratic predecessor and established a “federalism unit” to combat what he called “unwarranted regulation and systematic overreach” by Washington.
Remember, Sixty-three million of our neighbors voted for this.

And seven million of our neighbors chose to tantrum-piss away their votes rather than stand against this.

We should really find just the right way to thank them.

Poison Fruit from a Poison Tree

This. Must. All. End.

This from Mr. Paul Krugman of The New York Times may sound familiar to longtime readers (with emphasis added to brighten up the room):

The Silence of the Hacks

Jason Chaffetz, the chairman of the House oversight committee — who hounded Hillary Clinton endlessly over Benghazi — declared that the “situation has taken care of itself.”

Just the other day Republicans were hot in pursuit of potential scandal, and posed as ultrapatriots. Now they’re indifferent to actual subversion and the real possibility that we are being governed by people who take their cues from Moscow. Why?

Well, Senator Rand Paul explained it all: “We’ll never even get started with doing the things we need to do, like repealing Obamacare, if we’re spending our whole time having Republicans investigate Republicans.” Does anyone doubt that he was speaking for his whole party?

The point is that you can’t understand the mess we’re in without appreciating not just the potential corruption of the president, but the unmistakable corruption of his party — a party so intent on cutting taxes for the wealthy, deregulating banks and polluters and dismantling social programs that accepting foreign subversion is, apparently, a small price to pay.

Put it this way: I’ve been seeing comparisons between the emerging information on the Trump-Putin connection and the Watergate affair, which brought down a previous president. But while the potential scandal here is far worse than Watergate — Richard Nixon was sinister and scary, but nobody imagined that he might be taking instructions from a foreign power — it’s very hard to imagine today’s Republicans standing up for the Constitution the way their predecessors did.
Rather than face the ugly fact that the Left has been absolutely right about them all along, Republicans long ago sold their souls to a cabal of con-men and fascists who flattered them and praised them and coached them to blamed us Libtards every time Reality slapped Rush Limbaugh's dick out of their mouths.

The point is, there is nothing left worth saving inside husk of the Party of Lincoln. It has grown rotten from the root to the fruit and become something that must be aborted because it is unholy and evil.

Tom Waits Friday: Cold, Cold Ground

For the moment, The Bastard President's obscene Muslim ban is dead in the cold, cold ground.  Yes, it will be back after his scuttlefish attorneys nip and tuck and tailor it as best they can, but for the moment the courts have forced Trump to bend to their will.

These days, we celebrate what we can, when we can.  
when the road's washed out
they pass the bottle around
and wait in the arms
of the cold cold ground
cold cold ground

Thursday, February 16, 2017

One Hour and Seventeen Minutes

For one hour and seventeen minutes today, The Bastard President showed the world that he is a lying, rambling, paranoid half-mad man-baby who could not handle the simplest questions from the press.

It just so happens that almost exactly seven years ago, President Barack Obama held an extended Q&A in front of a genuinely hostile audience:   The House Republicans at their retreat in Baltimore. "moderated" by Mike Pence.  It was a bravura performance.  Working without notes and armed only with -- gasp! -- facts, logic, good humor and a mastery of the issues, President Obama wiped the floor with them..

It was such a brutal and comprehensive smiting that Fox News cut away from it 20 minutes before it ended.

President Obama's opening comments lasted about 20 minutes.

And because the Maker of All Things loves a good joke, President Obama's Q&A lasted almost exactly one hour and seventeen minutes:

Once of the things that makes this such a remarkable historical document is how clearly it shows the fundamental depravity of the GOP long before Donald Trump showed up.  The GOP relied entirely on deliberate half-truths, outright lies and the many bullshit conspiracies that they had concocted and fed to their base to explain why they were so bad at their jobs because this noxious brew of fraud and fairy tales and fake patriotism had long ago become the everyday working vocabulary of the Republican Party.  And all President Obama had to do to utterly humiliate them on their own turf was to follow James Cagney's axiom of, "Plant your feet, and tell the truth."

See, Republicans are horrified by the unvarnished truth.  They cannot bear to have it anywhere near them.  So if any of you clever national media dogs ever really want to solve the mystery of the Rise of Donald Trump, you would do well to stop hunting down every rambling "economically insecure" mouthbreather in Sisterfuck, Arkansas and start noticing that the GOP has been a festering shitpile of liars, demagogues, con men and mouthbreather-pandering lunatics for a long, long time.  

Always Six Laps Ahead Of The Professional Pundits

From ABC News' chief political consultant today:

From your humble scrivener, 1,000 years ago in October:
They Were All Against Me

They fought me at every turn.
Ah, but the birth certificate, that's, that's where I had them! 
They laughed at me and made jokes, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt, with geometric logic, that Barack Obama was a Kenyan Commie Sleeper Cell Usurper, and I'd have produced that evidence if they hadn't all conspired against me. 
I, I know now the Liberal media was only trying to protect their traitorous RINO friends...
Today was the day when the Republican party's nominee for president declared open war on the leadership of the Republican party for finally daring to timidly whisper about various, glaringly observable realities (h/t @Billmon).

So they've got that going for them...

I though about titling this post "Captain Queef", but of course that would have been wrong.

So very, very wrong.

Not enough popcorn on Orville Redenbacher's entire home planet...